How do I create calm in the midst of chaos?
I think most, if not all, of us can relate to this question. Life throws all sorts of things at us, and when you add little people and multiple schedules to that mix, it makes it so much more complicated.
But what if it didn’t have to be?
Obviously, we can’t control everything - sickness, emergencies, unexpected late nights at work, etc. all pop up. But when you create a base plan that allows for the unexpected bumps along the way, when you create little pockets of time that leave you refreshed and ready to return to life, you create a framework that enables you to live a fulfilled life.
Recently, I was talking with another mom, and she phrased it this way: ‘Storms are inevitable, but we can be the eye of the storm, the center of calm for our crazy, chaotic lives.’
Personally, I can attest to it being difficult to implement time management and pre-planning. I always thought, “Pre-planning is not something I would like or ever thrive on.” And so I just lived life trying to keep it all in my head, to have ‘freedom’ to do what I wanted and needed to do as I had time. But my brain felt like popping popcorn, ideas and little things I remembered constantly exploding and reminding me of yet another thing to add to my day.
When I finally started to implement time management, I found the exact opposite of what I always thought.
I thrive on the freedom time management and planning ahead of time creates.
It’s impossible for me to remember every little detail and thing to do in both my work life and personal life. But as soon as I get that all down on paper and a calendar and block off the time to do it, it suddenly doesn’t seem as daunting.
This week, Liz shares her tips on how she creates more time in her day in order to accomplish her goals. She also shares how she creates time for herself, because it is important to make time to recharge and return to what she calls ‘happy chaos.’
Tip #4: How to Create More Time
“Plan, plan, plan!
Talk with your spouse or support people to plan for a few hours a week to have kids and meal prep covered, and then a larger chunk (like a whole day!) once a month or so. You could even plan a yearly time away at a retreat or conference that will feed your soul. (Nursing babies usually come along, of course!)
Meal plan so you are not stressed at meal time and so the type of prep you need to do fits the schedule for that day of the week. It is amazing how simply feeling peaceful while you work seems to take less time and energy. This also makes the shopping list easier to create and easier to keep trips to the store to a minimum, which both save time. (Also utilize your crockpot and one-pan recipes - they help save so much time spent in the kitchen!)
Try to get the maximum from your time to yourself. What types of leisure activities truly feed your soul, help you rest, and leave you feeling refreshed? You have to return to the happy chaos at the end of it all, so you don't want to come back feeling worn out or overstimulated. Time in nature, reading life-giving books, creating art or crafts, exercise, prayer/meditation/silence and connecting with loved ones are all examples of soul-feeding leisure that can be really refreshing even in very small bursts.
Involve your family (especially kids!) in housework as much as possible. I am constantly asking myself, ‘Could a child do this task?’ This will also create moments together as you train a kid or work side-by-side. When you have spent a lot of meaningful time with your family, you will feel more at peace with the decision to leave them or do your own thing for a little while. It will also leave you with a bit less on your own to-do list.
Also teach your family to participate in and enjoy the activities that you love. One family chose to begin rock-climbing together so that Mom and Dad got to exercise, too, instead of spending their time driving kids to and from sports practices. Another hikes and runs together regularly for the same reason. I love to read good books that I love myself to my kids and to do family craft and cooking projects. Many families involve older kids in faith-related activities and parents trade off going with them. Suddenly you will need less time "away" because your life is more full of the things that nourish you and make you happy.
Keep a little list of long-term projects or ready-at-hand activities that you want to get to ‘when you have time.’ That way you will have ideas of what to get into when little pockets of time present themselves.
Enforce an afternoon quiet time for everyone until at least age 5. Some families do it for even longer! Audio books, repetitive crafts like potholder weaving or finger knitting, coloring/drawing, looking at picture books are great for those who no longer actually sleep during quiet time. Early bed time for littles also helps a lot.
Join a book club, Bible study, crafters' group, yoga class, etc. to have ‘appointment’ time to do something you love. It is easier to make yourself go, and for your family to release you, when it is happening at a scheduled time and/or people are counting on you to show up!”
Resources:
A Mother's Rule of Life by Holly Pierlot
Leisure, the Basis of Culture by Josef Pieper
The Well-Read Life: Nourish Your Soul through Deep Reading and Intentional Friendship by Colleen Hutt and Marcie Stokman
